Ghost of Cruises Past

Those of you who have been loyal readers of this blog may recall some fairly recent posts about the cruise that Dad, Patricia and I took earlier this month. I reported having immensely enjoyed the experience and expressed a desire to repeat it. Careful readers may also have noticed that when Patricia and I find something we like, such as Splash Mountain at Disneyland, we have no hesitation about doing it again more or less immediately.

Being armed with this intimate knowledge of my nature, dear reader, should somewhat temper your amazement that less than two weeks after our return from the first cruise Patricia and I decided to go on another one. The company emailed us a “special price” offer for a 4 day trip departing Monday 22 January and we jumped at it. Dad had some clients to meet in L.A., so he dropped us off at the Long Beach cruise terminal, then he went off to work and we went off to party.


Getting back on board the Paradise felt strange. Our previous trip had been recent enough that we both felt like we’d never really left. That feeling intensified when the first waitress I encountered came charging up to me and said “Hello! Where is Geoffrey?”

That’s right!

Not: “Hello! How are you?”

Not: “Hello! Welcome back!”

Not even: “Hello! What are you doing here?”

My presence was nothing more to this woman than an indicator of the possible proximity of my father. Feeling slightly unappreciated I explained that he had to work and that Patricia and I had come back to enjoy the last week of my vacation. Just then Patricia wandered back over with a drink and the waitress turned to her immediately. “Hello! Where is Geoffrey?”

I’m big enough to admit that I was small enough to feel slightly better.

Bizarrely, not 2 hours later almost the exact same routine was repeated with another waitress. I now wonder if perhaps the words “Where is Geoffrey?” are a common form of greeting in Indonesia. Possibly it is a phrase that means something like “I’m so glad you didn’t bring that boring, bearded man with you.”

My bruised feelings settled over the next few days as Patricia and I established our own connections with the waitresses. We did our best to be friendly and to tip appropriately. I thought we’d made considerable progress until we were just about to disembark and one of the same two waitresses parted from us with the words “Tell Mr Geoff to come back!”

If her English or my Indonesian could have supported it I would have said something like “Do you want me to bring him back or just deliver the message?”